Stop driving drunk...

Listening to Hippa to da Hoppa by ODB. ... I hadn't planned on doing anything like this until next week because doing things like this hasn't seemed to smooth me out lately. But now I'm bored and there is nothing on TV except Harvey Birdman and I've consumed my share of junk food for the day. ... So I'm back on the horse, kiddo. ... Some of these things are spinoffs, but that's what happens when Chris is part of your blogging group and comes up with good ideas. It's good. He won't sue me for copyright. And if he does, NYC and Cali will have a collision. ... Kid Dynamo is Capt. Kool Aid. ... Burn hydro. Don't burn your friends. ... I can ALMOST take off a bra with one hand. It's that last hook that crushes my dreams. ... I can't get someone out of my mind and I super duper really wish I could. ... This isn't a front. My mood really is better. ... Long blogs are the products of bad and good moods. ... The only lights on in this whole place come from my computer and my dope-to-death television screen. Don't hate. Imitate. ... Yeah, you're out drinking again. What a lush. Guess I won't be talking to you tonight. ... My pillow has been on my couch all day. ... I need to swing a bat. ... Sammy and Juice will be in Phoenix with me. ... I don't know who will be at the Kings-Lakers game with me. It's during the week. ... Stephen will be at the Wu Tang concert with me. ... Watch It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. You won't be disappointed. ... I haven't owned gel, hair spray or any stay-in-place hair products since ... like high school. ... Haircuts make me feel like I can walk into any room, flash a smile, cock my head and turn yours. Mr. Hunt knows this, too. ... He's much more fashionable than me. ... But I can hold an expenisve suit. It's just that most of you will never see that. ... I speak well to white people. ... I speak like a jackass to my people. ... I speak like a rebel at all times. ... Outlaws are always welcome here. ... Keep pushing us underground. We never forget, yo. ... Here's my fear: Hip hop will go overboard with its fake ass Obama support and soon he will turn into a charicature and won't seem real. He'll be like Biggie or Tupac, mostly visible on knee-length T-shirts on kids not old enough to vote or adults who couldn't tell you where or when the vote was. ... My mind skates. ... If you could rewind your life, at what point would you stop? ... There are no more girls clothes in my apartment. ... My dad's afro used to be REEDICKYOULUS. ... Yeah, I'd bone Rosario Dawson. ... Not Vida Guerra. I have high standards. ... BET and MTV are in bed to make the youth of this world dumber. Those are the first two channels to become extinct when I take over the solar system. ... I have a Gucci belt that I didn't pay for. That makes me smile. ... Can we stop with the fake jewlery? What do you think educated people think when they see shit like that? Seriously. You aren't fooling anyone, it doesn't look good and it shows that you try to be ghetto fabulous but can't afford it. ... This is the mind of someone who can step outside the body and look at the shell. ... Alex downloaded plenty of good music that I need. ... Try all the Redman albums, the new GZA, the first GZA, two Big L albums and the new Q-Tip, which he says is surprisingly good. ... My favorite ghost is Slimer. He goes through walls ... even vaginal ones. ... Biology is cool because when a girl cums, her lips turn cold. ... Maybe that's a way to tell if she fakes it. ... I've faked it. Sometimes shit just needs to end and the girl isn't making it happen. ... Yeah, you can suck at it, too. ... I appreciate all the concern for my bad week that is wrapping up. ... I've seen someone throw up from withdrawl. ... I've seen someone, recently, throw up at a bar. ... I've seen someone, recently, throw up WHILE driving me home. But I was just as thumped so I really couldn't say anything. ... Apple is the worst thing to happen to me lately. ... I love cereal. I hate milk. ... I like to eat toast with butter and jelly at like midnight and later. ... I miss hanging out with my dad and watching late-night sit-coms. ... For the first time in my life, I'm officially homesick. ... I'm trying not to hate you so much. ... The fact that I have to try isn't good, is it? ... I still get lost sometimes in the city I live in. ... Cigars suck but the socializing and relaxation that is associated with puffing one is something I desire. ... Never trust people unless they tell you they don't have a disease. ... Tacos aren't healthy food. ... You have to understand that I'm just a quiet person. I'm sorry if that doesn't jive with your never-stop-talking ass. ... At least I'm not a loser. ... Here's a good way to get me off: speak Spanish to me in bed. ... "Papi" and "Daddy" work, also. ... Shut up. ... You can grab it without trying to take it out. ... Your life is bigger than the club and getting hammered inside of it. ... Get over youself a little bit and live in reality as an adult. If you don't know how to handle real life, don't take it out on me. ... I wasn't an asshole because I'm not, despite what you might think. ... It's nice thinking with a clear head. ... "Would you rather have a Lexus or justice? A dream or some substance or a Beamer or a necklace or freedom?" ... I won't drink any tequila unless I've had good stuff long enough to make me not care. ... I've changed a lot since the summer started. It's not evident by looking at me. ... You need to take stock in your life if you let a guy cum inside you and you don't even know much more than his last name. ... You need to take stock in your life and an STD test if you're the guy who does that. ... Listening to Monsters by Scarface. ... Be cool and enjoy the food you eat. It's one of the few real pleasures of life.