Cartoons fucking rock...

Listening to Axis: Bold as Love by Jimi Hendrix. ... Palo Alto is now seen in a whole new light for more than one reason. ... Right now, I really want to fight someone, but he's a senior citizen. It's an easy win but that's not even why. No one acts like I'm their kid except my parents. ... I got too many clothes and not enough closets. ... I got to stop drinking soda, man. It's killing me. ... I backtracked on that tattoo thing. ... I want a haircut. ... That 70's Show comes on A LOT. ... If you don't have the Boomerang channel, step up your cable game. ... I want to go swimming again. ... And make out with someone. ... I haven't played ball in a long ass time. Motherfuckers around here ain't that good anyway. ... Whoever said life is short musta had non-stop pussy, a lot of money, no job and good weather. Otherwise, that shit is bogus. ... I don't drink Red Bull, Monster, Rockstar or coffee. Kill that noise. ... Stop smoking cigarettes. That shit is gross. I probably wrote that before. ... The sex blogs have taken on new life. ... I'm in Jeff and Darcy's wedding. I think Alex is my plus-one. ... If you read this stuff, don't do it to find out about me or what's going on in my life. Just read it for entertainment or inspiration to write your own shit. And if you don't have a place to stick it, just email it to me and I'll post it up with your name. But again, don't try to read between these lines or assume shit or figure anything out other than what is EXACTLY written. Otherwise you look like a damn fool. This is written with a murky tone for a reason. I'm not stupid. I know what I'm doing, yo. ... Alex just told me that if I get him tanked enough, he might put out. Dope. ... No sex in a while. ... Woodgrain threw up in the club recently. Not once, but twice. Hilarity ensued. Then I danced with Lisa. ... Speaking of that, her friend said I should be her baby's father. And her other friend, who is engaged, told me "my pussy is tight. Is that OK?" ... Why would a girl think that after we've seen each other naked and she's already flipped out about something that was none of her business, that we could just be platonic friends? Idiocy. ... I gotta go. I think I'm gonna drink tonight and watch the Lakers. ... Listening to Wait by the Ying Yang Twins. ... Be cool and boy shorts are nice.