Amber says: I'll take the drink, not bone you...

This is a big day as The Hideout has its first female guest blogger. Amber is pretty dope, and she simply got tired of the one-sidedness of this blog, so she provides perspective. Agree or disagree with the thoughts, it's pretty good. Soak up game...

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In an attempt to debunk the common belief that ALL women are the same…here is a female perspective in response to the extremely biased and slightly skewed opinions provided to you on this page. A special thank you to all my girls who have provided commentary for this piece…

Fellas, fellas, fellas…what can I say? You are right to think that women are complicated, if we weren't meant to be that way we wouldn't have been created to experience monthly menstrual cycles filled with mood swings, cramping and the intense urge to binge out on everything we see in our kitchen cabinets. But, then again, those 4-7 days of hateful bliss is our only true assurance we aren't carrying your child. No, not every lady "friend" wishes to shed the most painful moments of her life on creating the next you…well at least not at the moment, no matter how cute and athletic the kid would be. This time of month is also our most horny and sexually vulnerable. You want your lady to do the freaky nasty with you in bed… the time to ask is no more than 7 days prior to the start of that monthly nightmare. Then again, you shouldn't have to ask, if she's worth your time, she WILL come to you. By the way, have we ever mentioned how easy ya'll have it?

I would have to agree with the posts saying that panties are ALWAYS optional. Of course they are and for any lady who disagrees, well she's a prude and probably boring once you get her undressed anyways. Why do men always assume that when we go out looking good that we are dressing up for you? And why are all the sexy clothes made to be sold to short women when clothes are made to be modeled by women over 5'10"? I'm 6'1" and am forced to pay more money than my counterparts to look good because I grew up drinking a lot of milk and was blessed with good genes. Yes, I'm tall….and any tool that mentions my height is nothing more than an observant douchebag. No, I'm not a model. Yes, I played basketball. No, I did not play a sport in college....but I could have if I wanted to. Yes, I get asked the same stupid ass questions EVERY fucking day of my life. I digress….Sometimes a woman likes to dress sexy for her and only her. And just because we might be showing skin in all the right places…this is NOT an open invitation for you to pounce us on the dance floor like a fucking cougar and lay your hands where no man has any right to go without at the very least an introduction and a little conversation….and even still, that does not grant you grazing privileges. And FYI, if you assume buying us a drink means we owe you anything related to the above, you're wrong, and that is your problem. We'll gladly accept them, but if you're gonna be a man and take that risk, then be a man and don't piss and moan when we kindly thank you and walk away. Those bitches that let that shit fly and are taking their pants off at bars are also taking their pants off for plenty of other guys in or out of the bar. While I agree manipulating dumb bitches is amusing... To those ladies I say this….stop making all women out to be slores. It's because of you that respectable, confident, self-assured women are forced to deal with assholes on a day-to-day basis. Clean up your act. Yes, I call my own kind bitches…that's because we are. It's in our nature, most likely a defense mechanism granted to us to deal with all you men for whom it is in your nature to think you are the shit.

Of course we act up sometimes…we are women and we are complicated, remember? For those of you who haven't caught on, you need to get used to it…just like you need to accept the fact that we will be bitches. But, that same bitch will also make you pancakes and eggs the next morning…yes, even in our panties, assuming you're the kind of man who treats us more than well enough to make us feel as sexy as we are…and we might even deliver it to you in bed. Perhaps the reason women act up is because we'd like a little love and recognition for all that we do for your lazy asses…is it too much to ask for a little cuddling throughout the day and/or night…just one of MANY theories… I hate to admit it, but even the most independent woman on some level has a desire to please her man. Yet, this same woman appreciates a man who can take care of her….in AND out of bed.

In honor of the spirit of this blog…listening to Bust Your Windows…be cool, eat right, and don't piss off your woman